"So we're back in the business just like that."

"Yup."

"Well that's cool."

Anton: So you think you're ready to get thrown into a crazy stip match Cor?

Cordazer: Really it's a crazy stip?

Aleister: Yeah man, that's like the theme of this PPV.

Cordazer: Oh great.

Edward: Something wrong, brother?

Cordazer: Oh nothing, just...memories

Edward: Well no one said you had to be the guy wrestling here. Besides we're paying these two trick-or-treat motherfuckers, they should wrestle.

Anton: All our costume is, is putting on some extra clothes, you're the one who puts gallons of make up on, you drag-queen.

Edward: Kay, so it's gonna be Anton against this question mark in the Scorpion tank-inferno-scaffold-C4 explosive-cage-thunderdome match.

Cordazer: Guess so.

Aleister: Or the STISCECT match.

Edward: Well I suggest you wait on watching the freshly downloaded porno on your desktop and start downloading some fucked up Japanese wrestling to prepare for the task.

Aleister: HA, it's a gay porn too.

Edward: Of course.

Cordazer and Edward step into the kitchen of their apartment. The kitten is playing on the table, Cordazer picks it up and plops it in his lap and starts petting it.

Edward: So the event is taking place in China.

Cordazer: Sweet, I've never been...

Edward: Me neither, I suggest we wear all read to support communism.

Cordazer: Are you suggesting what I think you are?

Edward: Yup.

Both together: SHOPPING!!!!


Stay tuned kids

Anton got to work pretty fast, quickly tossing one off and then heading right for the Japanese death matches.





While Anton was an implacable ninja, possessed of an iron will, able to achieve orgasm through manual stimulation in under nine seconds, even his stomach was turned at the sight of the two hardcore legends beating seven shades of shite out of one another.

"And they want me to bump into scorpion tanks as well!" he exclaimed to his fellow ninja Alastair, who was currently hiding using a completely white sheet hung across one side of the trailer.

Everyone knew scorpions were the most dangerous animals in the world. Any google image search would tell you that:



Look at that fucker!

"Jesus Christ..."

Somewhere, thousands of miles away, Anton's call was answered. Jesus Christ looked up from his drink and frowned.

"Sounds like someone needs me, brother." Jesus slammed down his drink (without paying, since he could use his Jesus powers to avoid little annoyances like that). "C'mon, Edward."

His pet panther, a majestic female myelinated leopard named Edward, jumped up at his command and fell in behind the towering, afro-sporting shape of the man who was, in every way that did matter and will ever matter, Jesus.

As he left the bar and kick-started his motorbike, threw on his shades and prepared to rock, roll, and everything in between, Jesus reflected on the enormity of the task in front of him. As Jesus, he knew everything that was going to happen, and it held no fear for him.

He had to save two ninjas from Scorponok. Or something.

Fortunately, this was no ordinary Jesus: it was Goliath Rockerfeller: Black Jesus.