Hammer wanted the show off so Valerie Stern approved a replacement, but who is his replacment and who will his opponent be?

Stay Tuned!

There has been a stipulation added to this slobberknocker~!:

Loser must be winner's butler/maid.

Holy crap on stick folks~! Another stip has been added, as punishment for Jabbar's actions, Ms. Stern has made this a bra and panties match, whoa doggies!

Ah, the S.S. Mart. The boat made famous by its appearance in a recent magazine ad was being used by Infinity to relocate themselves to the Bahamas. Oddly enough, Hammer has never been to the Bahamas...he's been almost every place in the world except the Bahamas and Mecca. He needs to make his pilgrimage there someday, but the Middle East does not look like a friendly place to travel these days. Hammer is looking forward to the Bahamas though. What a majestic place it should be.

Speaking of majestic, Hammer is no longer involved in the tournament for the Majestic Cup. Nice segue, eh? Oh yeah, and there's an even bigger piece of business than that to address...the Muslim Megastar just happens to be the newest member of Infinity.

Yes, that Infinity. The Infinity that is running roughshod over professional wrestling, the Infinity that will rule the newly named TCW by the end of the year, the Infinity that only the elite can claim membership to. Mutaaz Tareef has always considered himself in a class above the average man...like a washed up rapper once said, it ain't bragging motherfucker if you back it up.

With no tournament match for him to take part in, Hammer sees little reason to wrestle. His aching body could use some time off anyway before he faces one of the Ghetto Grass members on PPV. Oh, you know it's coming. They are none too thrilled with Hammer's defection to Infinity, and since they aren't emo kids Hammer figures they're probably going to be coming for him sooner rather than later.

He's looking forward to it...he wants to know how much he was able to teach them in the past few months. Certainly he didn't teach them everything he knew, but he likes to think that he is a good teacher. If they go on to succeed without him, it will be a feather in his cap.

Tareef hopes that he will be able to be as important to his new friends as he was to his old ones. He's been talking with each of them during the ride over...Shadow wanted him to sign an endorsement deal with S-Mart, Hammer saw no problem with that because he's all about getting a little extra on the side and he enjoys shopping there. DeSean seemed like a kid Hammer could identify with, though he didn't appear to be in a very good mood at the moment. No wonder Hammer identifies with him.

Hammer couldn't help but be impressed with Titanium Insomniac. To be honest, most of what he was saying went over Hammer's head. Hammer went to UCLA after all, not Stanford or one of those Ivy League schools in the northeast. But, Hammer certainly respects him and is glad to be on his side. Highone seemed like a simple kind of guy, easy to get along with as long as you don't piss him off. David Hardy seemed pretty cool for a Hardy (sorry, that's just the part of me coming out that despises Jeff Hardy), but it seemed like his mind was on other matters. Of course, the rest of these guys have matches to concentrate on and parties in the Bahamas to look forward to, so Hammer can understand if they don't want to gossip right now.

He goes back to the room where Jabbar is finally finishing off his movie script after weeks of writing. After some editing, he'll be able to pitch it to all the movie companies...hopefully recent world events won't hurt his chances. Hammer comes into the room to discuss strategy...

Hammer: You know, I'd feel a lot better about this thing if it weren't for that damn new boss.

Jabbar: Yeah.

Hammer: Valerie Stern...who does she think she is telling me what to do?

Jabbar: Dunno.

Hammer: At least she realizes that I'm a ratings draw...I guess I can't say she's an idiot because who wouldn't want Hammer on their show?

Jabbar: Right.

Hammer: But it still pisses me off...of all the people to make the first example of, why me? What's she got against me? Is it because I joined Infinity, turned my back on Ghetto Grass and made all the fans cry?

Jabbar: Maybe.

Hammer: All I know is there's no way she's suspending me. So I need to find somebody to take my place on the show. I'd have one of the Infinity guys do it, but they're all booked.

Jabbar: Mmmhmmm.

Hammer looks towards Jabbar and notices that he is watching CNN on the television.

Hammer: You're not paying attention to me, are you?

Jabbar looks up

Jabbar: Oh, sorry Mutaaz.

Hammer: Are the Israelis still bombing?

Jabbar: Yeah...

Hammer: I know this has to get under your skin, man.

Jabbar: I'm not going to say that Hezbollah was right in kidnapping Israeli soldiers. But you know, they just do this over and over again. They always take things way too far and kill thousands of innocent people in the process. The biggest mistake the United Nations ever made was taking that land away from the Palestinians.

Hammer: I'd say the whole ignoring the Rwandan genocide thing was a bigger mistake, but it's definitely on the list.

Jabbar: It makes me so mad.

Hammer: I know it does. I know you're proud of your past as a freedom fighter in Afghanistan. You need to let that anger out, man.

Jabbar: Yeah, but how?

Hammer: You know how you always wanted to be a wrestler?

Jabbar's jaw drops...

Jabbar: Are you insane?

Hammer: What?

Jabbar: In case you didn't notice, I'm an old, brittle man! I can no longer physically defend myself!

Hammer: Dude, you'll be fine. They'll probably book you against some Ghetto Grass kid anyway. Remember how much you always hated them?

Jabbar: Oh yeah...

Hammer: And you'll have me behind you if anything happens to go wrong. I'll make sure you're physically ready. Don't worry! You've seen the old geezers making asses out of themselves on TV in the wrestling ring lately, if they can wrestle certainly you can.

Jabbar: Well, I can't wrestle. But I'll defend myself just like my friends in Lebanon.

Hammer: Do you have friends there?

Jabbar: Oh yeah. Well, I did anyway.

Hammer: Do I wanna know?

Jabbar: Probably not.

Muhammad Jabbar? In the wrestling ring? Who will he face?

The answer may not be who you think. Or it may be exactly who you think. I don't know, I'm not a mind reader.

The sounds of the X-Press, we're......

You know what I'm not going describe the music coming out of the speakers or all the dents and holes in the bus, because I've done that to start a post more than four times.

And it's a thing that boring feuders do.

Describe things too much.

It's like "Blah, blah, takes a swig of beer, nasty bitterness, blah, blah."

Makes me want to say, "dude just cut to the action already"~!

So I'm gonna follow my own advice here...

Yasmin sat in the leaf printed sofa with her husband's head near her midriff. The leader of the gang sat in his chair next to the mini-refrigerated chair where the newest member- Limey- sat.

Oh you're wondering where Miss Interesting is?

Wow I'm glad somebody cares, cause I was thinking about getting rid of her since she does nothing but lose my damn titles.....

ANYways she's sitting in her Italian Flag printed E-Z Recliner.

Yeah she got pretty drunk after that soccer game.

Which game, you ask?

Oh you know that big one they had against France?

Still not ringing a bell...hmmm, the one where the bald guy headbutted that pussy guy.

Yes I knew that would refresh your memory

She's also the one in control of the remote at the moment. Hey it's a very powerful position to be held on the Ghetto Grass X-Press!

Alexxx decides she doesn't know what's going on in the world outside of the fed....

Whoa wait a minute, I totally forgot to explain how the holy hell the X-Press got to the Bahamas. I'm sure you've been wondering you inquisitive fuck you.

Well the bus was transported by an airplane and brought straight down to the parking lot.

There are you happy?!

Ok back on topic:
Alexxx decides she doesn't know what's going on in the world outside of the fed (shocker there) and stops flicking the 'up' button when she gets to CNN.

"Coming up next Israel and Palestine ready for a real war?"

Yasmin: "I wish they wouldn't fight."

Stoner: "Like there's anything you can do about it babe, they've only been fighting for a gazillion years."

Yasmin: "You don't think I know? My parents' families fight all the time."

Limey: "Lots of peoples' families fight."

Yasmin: "My mom's from Israel and my dad's Palestinian. So I know first hand."

Alexxx: "I thought you were from Iran..."

Yasmin: "That's where I was born. My parents couldn't decide where to have me so they settled and went to Iran."

Limey: "Nice compromise."

* Silence is the sound for a couple minutes until Ghetto breaks it with two words. *

Ghetto: "Fuck Hammer."

Stoner: "No thanks I got a wife. But speaking of that terrorist..."

GASP~!

Stoner: "What?"

An FCC representative comes up from off stage and whispers into Stoner's ear.

Stoner: "Oh that's racist, I see, kay dude, sorry. Anyways what's he doing this round?"

Alexxx: "He took the show off."

Stoner: "Of course right when we could be getting our revenge he decides he needs a break, lame dude."

Limey: "I over heard someone say that he needed to find a replacement or he'd be fired."

Stoner: "Who told you that dude? Pepsi?"

Limey: "Actually it was Coke, now shut up."

Yasmin & Stoner: "Mmmmm Coke."

Alexxx: "I'll take on his replacement."

Ghetto: "No."

Stoner: "Dude are you STILL mad at her for losing the tag titles?"

Ghetto: "A tad."

Yasmin: "Fine I'll do it."

EVERYONE:

Yasmin: "What I got some fight in me? And I will do it for Israel!"

Alexxx: "Don't like Palestine?"

Yasmin: "I support my mom more."

Alexxx: "But Israel killed Muslims for no reason."

Yasmin: "So."

Alexxx: "Ugh fine."

Limey: "I'll go confirm with the dynamic Muslim duo, since I'm the only one who doesn't want to slash Hammer's head off."

Before anyone can tell the lovable can of soda any different he's out the door.

**Later at 1:00 AM on the S.S. Mart.**

"Gawd what am I doing up this late, a megastar like me should be getting his beauty sleep."

Those were the thoughts of Hammer as he walked out to the area of the boat that's most convenient for fishing. Yes even though the Bahamas' stars were a magnificent site that wasn't the reason he was up and about.

He heard a clunk, it was pretty loud considering it woke him up and caused him to come out here and investigate matters.

Hammer: "Hello? Anybody up here? DeSean? Shads?"

"Hello."

Hammer: "Who's there."

"Jo Momma."

Hammer: "Haha very funny, now reveal your identity infidel!"

"My name is Limey, I'm the coolest, newest and most levelheaded member of Ghetto Grass."

Hammer: "Oh really have they sent you to assassinate me?"

Limey: "On the contrary Mutaaz buddy~! I'm here to make an offer."

Hammer: "Money?"

Limey: "No, a match. Yasmin wants to fight your replacement."

Hammer: "Yasmin, the non-wrestling girl of that pot-smoking faction?

Limey: "Duh, I think you know the answer to that."

Hammer: "I actually like this idea, you see my replacement is Jabbar and I think Yasmin would be his perfect opponent."

Limey: "Same thoughts here. But this match should have a stipulation to sweeten it."

Hammer: "If Jabbar wins, I get a title shot."

Limey: "Umm no."

Hammer: "Hmm I need someone to help me get drinks. A maid would be cool to have that way I'd send her up here instead of doing it myself."

Limey: "Then how bout a "loser-must-be-winner's-maid/butler" match?"

Hammer: "I'm liking this idea a lot Lemony."

Limey: "It's Limey."

Hammer: "Right, I'm sorry see there was this British guy I used to know, I called him that like all the time."

Limey: "Understandable."

Hammer: "Wow you seem like not to bad of a guy Orangey. How bout we shake on it?"

Limey: "I don't think you really want to do that."

Hammer: "Why?"

Limey: "I'll explode if you do."

Hammer: "Ummm okay."

* After that Hammer just hears a small splash and we fade into the confused look of Mutaaz Tareef. *

"A talking can of Sprite?"

Muhammad Jabbar quizzically looks at Hammer. Hammer is sitting in a director chair having his hair styled by a rather attractive makeup lady. Today is Hammer's first S-Mart commercial shoot, and they're sparing no expense to make the Muslim Megastar look as good as he thinks he does.

Hammer: Yeah, said he was the newest member of Ghetto Grass.

Jabbar: You sure this wasn't just some weird dream?

Hammer: Sure I'm sure. Would I lie to you?

Jabbar rubs his chin and ponders the question.

Hammer: (to makeup lady) Thanks honey. (to Jabbar) Listen here's the deal. You're going to be facing Yasmin at the show.

Jabbar: Yasmin?

Hammer: Yeah. You got off easy.

Jabbar: What do you mean I got off easy? Do you have any idea how embarassing it would be if I........

Hammer: If you...

Jabbar: If I lost to her?

Hammer: What?

Jabbar: Hey, stranger things have happened!

Hammer: Listen to me. You're not going to lose to her. I'm not going to let that happen. Infinity is not going to let that happen. Understand?

Jabbar: But if I was to lose to that......half-breed!

Hammer: Half-breed? I thought she was Persian!

Jabbar: Yeah. We were talking once when you were showing the rest of Ghetto Grass some wrestling moves and she told me that her mother was an Israeli.

Hammer: An Israeli?

Jabbar: Yeah, I was shocked too.

Hammer: Well I'll be damned.

Jabbar: No, she will. I can not lose to that infidel.

Hammer: Then don't. If you think you are going to lose, you will. Keep a positive attitude, and you will win.

Jabbar: Really? If it's just about keeping a positive attitude, why do you almost always lose?

Hammer: I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that. Oh yeah, one other thing...when you win, Yasmin is going to be our maid.

Jabbar: Sounds good. But what if I lose?

Hammer: You get to be Ghetto Grass's butler.

Jabbar: WHAT?

Hammer: Makeup!

The makeup lady reappears and begins applying cartons of makeup to Hammer's face while Jabbar yells and screams at nobody in particular. While this is going on, let's see what's going on with those lovable Ghetto Grass kids. They all woke up at the crack of noon in their X-Press, so Limey is giving them the good news.

Limey: I spoke with the one you call "Hammer" last night. He agreed to have Jabbar face you, Yasmin, but under one condition.

Yasmin: Yeah?

Limey: If you win the match, Muhammad Jabbar will serve as Ghetto Grass's butler.

All of Ghetto Grass: Sweet!

Limey: But...if you lose, you will serve as Hammer & Jabbar's maid.

Yasmin & Stoner look concerned, but Ghetto Fire & Alexxx are celebrating the fact that soon they will have a new butler.


Ghetto Fire: Hell yeah! That punkass Jabbar is going to be in for a hell of a treat!

Alexxx: I've got some dirty laundry that could use some cleaning...

Ghetto Fire: And the X-Press could use some cleaning too, that's for sure!

Stoner: Hey now, I'm not sure if I like this too much!

GF & Alexxx: Why not?

Stoner: How would you feel if there was a chance that the woman that you love could be working...as a maid, mind you...for people that you hate?

Alexxx: Don't know, I've never loved a woman.

Yasmin: You know what he means, Alexxx! I'm not a wrestler, what if I end up losing and have to work for those creeps?

Ghetto Fire: Don't worry about it! Jabbar ain't nothing physically, hell, he probably weighs even less than you without the 20 pounds of sheets he wears.

Alexxx: And you know that we'll have your back if anything unplanned happens!

Limey: Yasmin, I know that Muhammad Jabbar might seem like a threat to you. He is not a threat that you can't overcome without the proper training, though.

Stoner: Yeah Limey, you have a point. Baby, I'm going to make sure that you'll be ready to fight that towelhead!

All of Ghetto Grass gasps.

Stoner: What? The FCC won't let me say that either?

Yasmin: OK guys...I think I can do it!

Ghetto Fire: Let's go to the gym and get you trained!

Ghetto Grass goes to a nearby gym and Yasmin starts training. You can imagine all kinds of hot clips of Yasmin sweating while working out to the which originally appeared in . I only mention all of this so you might get the song in your head.

While all of this is going on, Mutaaz Tareef is standing on a soundstage about to make his debut as a spokesperson for S-Mart. Jabbar is still pitching a fit in the background, but nobody pays attention to him.

Director: In 5, 4, 3, 2........

Hammer (voiceover): When you're a boxing legend

*footage of Frank Stallone knocking a bitch out*

Hammer (voiceover): a wrestling icon

*footage of Mutaaz Tareef doing the Burning Hammer to a bitch*

Hammer (voice over): and a Muslim Megastar

*footage of Hammer praying in the ring, followed by Hammer himself walking on-screen*

Hammer: there's only one place to get what you need.

*S-Mart logo flashes on the screen*

Hammer: This week at S-Mart, get your brand-new Muslim Megastar t-shirt for only twenty dollars! And don't forget to pick up the first ever Infinity t-shirt! It's what all the cool kids will be wearing at school this year, the official t-shirts of the best wrestlers in world! And you can only get them at...

Jingle singers: S-Mart! Where we have...a heart!

Director: CUT!

Hammer: So, how'd I do?

Director: Not bad. Now go get your makeup redone...we've got 87 of these left to film and I want you looking as good as you can!

Hammer walks off stage and heads back to his chair, where Jabbar is still yelling and screaming...

Jabbar: I will not be that woman's butler!

Hammer: That's right.

Jabbar: I need to do something to get their attention before the match!

Hammer: OK.

Jabbar: I got it!

Hammer: Good.

Jabbar: If Israel wants to attack my people for no good reason...two can play at that game...

Jabbar walks off laughing to himself while the makeup lady reappears to apply several more coats of makeup to Hammer's face.

Makeup lady: What was he talking about?

Hammer: Beats me. You doing anything after the shoot? I know these guys who will be throwing one hell of a party...

Ah, what a joy it is to see, the Grand Bahama stadium. Not the arena where the show will take place, but the only other stadium on the island.

According to worldstadiums.com anyway.

The Grand stadium could hold about 31 hundred people. Perfect for a mini-press conference and an autograph session to take place, which is what Ghetto Grass was doing at the moment.

This was the day after Yasmin's training session in case you couldn't figure that out. The faction was there to hype the match between her and Muhammad Jabbar, and the inevitable match between Hammer and them at the upcoming PPV.

So I'm going to skip the part where they tell the packed crowd the stip, the part where they call Hammer a coward, and the part when Stoner moons the audience, to a very scary loud pop.

What can I say? Wrestling crowds like male asses.

So how come they don't like George W. Bush?

So after skipping all these totally non-generic press conference moments, in comes an old looking fellow carrying a cloth of some sorts.

Stoner: "Dude it's Jabbar!"

The live audience also picks up on this observation and rings out with a chorus of boos.

Jabbar: "Good afternoon infidels!"

The only ‘fidels' that are talked about around these parts are ones that end with ‘Castro'.

BOOOOO!

Jabbar: "You may know this or not, I'm not exactly sure how high the intelligence level of this place is, but I will be in a match against that impure "woman" over there in match where when she loses she will be my personal maid."

Yasmin: "You mean you'll be mine and Stoner's butler, old man. And what's with you calling me impure?"

Jabbar: "Everyone that girl sitting over there, is Israeli and Persian!"

Crickets can be heard chirping throughout the area. Like they care.

Jabbar: "And she supports Israel, who kill Muslims for no reason."



Jabbar: "Oh yeah, I'll make all you ignorant humans out there care!"

At this very moment, a stretch limo pulls up in the distance. Far away enough so not to draw any attention, but close enough so that whoever came out of it could see the proceedings taking place on the field.

Oh lookey what a surprise it's Mutaaz Tareef~!

Hammer is looking very spiffy with his suit and designer sunglasses. And having that "I just shot a commercial and made thousands of dollars" stride of confidence in him helped him look the part.

Hammer: "What is that man doing?"

I'm sure you'd like to know the answer to that too.

Wouldn't you?

Yeah I know you do.........

..............................................

Ok I'll tell ya.

Jabbar then unravels that cloth he had with him to make clear what it is:



You damn right that's what it was.

And to make things even more shocking, the Spiritual Advisor flings out a lighter.

Hammer: "I knew he had it in him."

TCW Road Agent Jason Fragg usually stands just to the side of the stage during these press conference/autograph signing things. He usually does not get involved in these things, but Muhammad Jabbar is really pushing his buttons right now.

Speaking of pushing buttons, TCW Commissioner Valerie Stern is pushing a few buttons on her phone at this very moment. She is not happy at all with what she is seeing at this event, which just happened to be televised because the Bahamas doesn't have much else going on besides fun in the sun. It's not a bad thing...it's just how it is there.

Fragg's cell phone rings. He answers, listens for a few seconds, nods, hangs up, and then heads up onto the stage.

Jabbar: Sons of Israel, watch as I......ahhhhhhhhhh!

The "ahhhhhhhh" comes after Fragg yanks the Israeli flag out of his hands.

Jabbar: INFIDEL!

To add to the confusion going on, a couple of agents not employed by TCW walk up onto stage carrying what appear to be several flags. One of them takes the microphone from the podium.

Agent 1: Ahem...we are sorry to interrupt this previously scheduled press conference, but we have to step in because Mr. Jabbar was just about to violate the codes of the FCC.

Stoner: FCC? I thought you guys only had jurisdiction in America!

Agent 2: We have jurisdiction over all material that will be televised in America.

All of Ghetto Grass: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Jabbar: Give me that damn rag!

Agent 1: We can not allow you to desecrate the flag of Israel. However, we do have several flags that our bosses would have no problem with you burning, if that's what you insist on doing...

Agent 2: Your first choice.



Jabbar: WHAT? BURN THE FLAG OF IRAN? ARE YOU INSANE?

Agent 2: Ok, how bout this one?



Jabbar: INFIDELS!

Yasmin: Hey, I'll take that one!

Jabbar: No you won't, you filthy whore!

Agent 3: This one more to your liking?



Jabbar: I will not burn the flag of any Islamic nation!

Yasmin: Bring them all over here, we gotta light up our smokes with something anyway!

Jabbar: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Jabbar lunges at Ghetto Grass, but he is restrained by security. It doesn't take that much to restrain Jabbar physically...the most annoying part is his screaming of Arabic phrases in the ears of people trying to restrain him.

While that is going on, Fragg receives another phone call. As requested, he puts it on speaker phone and holds it up to the microphone on the podium.

Valerie Stern: Jabbar! Jabbar! Listen to me! Your actions today will not be tolerated by me or anybody else affiliated with TCW! I will not have a boycott of our promotion due to you and Mutaaz Tareef's constant muck raking. You can glorify your religion all you want, but you will not be allowed to degrade the religions of others. As a punishment for what you tried to do today, I will add another stipulation to your match with Yasmin at Havoc. The loser of your match will be the person who gets stripped down to their underwear!

The crowd cheers as Jabbar goes ballistic on stage, screaming at anybody who will listen. Stoner & Yasmin look a little concerned, but the rest of Ghetto Grass is high-fiving and celebrating like the US just won the World Cup.

Meanwhile, Mutaaz Tareef looks on from just outside his limo, parked far enough away so nobody can notice him, but close enough so he can hear everything that is going on. It was becoming obvious to him that Valerie Stern didn't like him very much. It couldn't be a coincidence that Hammer & Jabbar were the targets of her rulings since taking over TCW.

How come she didn't say anything when Mac Avoy blew three holes in Shadow's boat? That certainly seemed like a bigger offense to Hammer than Jabbar threatening to burn the flag of Israel. Something wasn't right here. Stern had it in for him.

"It's all right," Hammer thinks. "She wouldn't be the first woman I've driven out of this promotion."

There is more serious business at hand though...namely the health of his spiritual advisor. Hammer was unconvinced that Yasmin could pose a threat to Jabbar at first, but recent events have changed his mind. More importantly, if somehow Jabbar was to lose, he would likely go insane. Hammer has always believed that even if the deck doesn't need to be stacked, you should go ahead and stack it anyway just in case.

So he makes a call on his cell phone (which gets great reception in the Bahamas, by the way).

Hammer: Hey. I'm all right, but things here aren't going well. The commish is out to get us. Yeah, I'm shocked too. Remember that thing we talked about on the phone last night? I'm going to need you more than I originally thought. You can take that day off, right? Good. See ya then. You too.

Hammer then hangs up and cracks a smile. He gets into the limo and it drives off as the screen fades to black...

You know, I don't think I've done a fade to black at the end of a post in a long time. It feels pretty good.

*fade to black*

A bra and panties match.

The thought kept ringing and ringing through Yasmin's head.

No she didn't mind possibly baring it all to thousands of guys who probably download all of Stoner's matches just to see her.

But she didn't like the match itself.

Her husband was an avid internet user and he read a smart mark report about a female wrestler who suffered major injuries at the hands of this same stipulation matches just recently.

And the match will be scary, it will be horrifying. It will resemble HELL.

Her demonic thoughts though, are interrupted by Ghetto passing something to Yasmin.

Ghetto: Hey Yaz smoke some of 'Iraq'.

Yasmin: No thanks.



Stoner: Dudes, we need to go to the hospital Yasmin must've suffered major brain damage from this heat.

Ghetto: Are you sure it's not cause we smoke all the time?



Limey: Don't be silly.

Ghetto: Yeah I know, I was just yanking y'all's chain.

Yasmin: I'm feeling fine. I just think I should start training HARDER.

Stoner & Ghetto: Aaaawwwwwww.

Yasmin: Well you boys can sit around, smoke and watch music videos.

"Yes~!" The two dudes high-five each other.

Yasmin: Alexxx and Limey can go to the gym and help me out.

Limey: Just don't take me into the sauna.

Alexxx: Yeah I'll go with you, someone has to keep an eye out for that crazy old foo.

Ghetto: Hammer?

Alexxx: No, the older, crazier, and wrinklier one.

Ghetto: Oh Jabbar.

Alexxx: Yeah.

~ Let's check and see what Mista Jabbar is up to.~

Jabbar: Do any of you INFIDELS, want MY autograph?!

NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Jabbar: Yeah, well, I wouldnt've even opened a sharpie for you ignorant fools! Yes that's all you are. You're Prime Minister is a former athlete! What kind of nonsense is that!? You know the correct word for this entire place is?

???

Jabbar: A SHITHOLE!



Jabbar: Yeah you heard me!!! Or is everyone on these islands def? Well just incase the other 699 islands didn't hear me.....THIS PLACE IS A SHITOLE! If the Great Prophet was still alive, he would use it as his toilet! No I retract my statement, this would be his toilet's dumping ground!

YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!

Jabbar then breaks down in hysterical laughter and looks up to the heavens.

Jabbar: Muahaha! I'll make sure not to release my movie here, for the simple fact that you people would not understand the aspect of it.

Muhammad then rips one of his sheets, gets on the ground and shouts...

Jabbar: ALLAH! ALLAH! ALLAH!

**From a rooftop not to far away is Mutaaz Tareef is on top of a tall building with his elbows laying on the side so he could see over the edge and watch as his spiritual advisor has a gargantuan breakdown.**

Hammer: The old foo has finally snapped.

Tareef then walks over to the other ledge as he looks down upon a familiar 'Ghetto' car stop in front of a local gym and drop off the two Grass Babes.....with the can of soda in tow.

He hears foot steps coming up from behind him. Most likely that of a woman's. The high heel sound gave her away.

"Hey."

The two embrace on the rooftop like a wife and husband that had been separated for 10 years because the husband went to jail. Hammer is usually not an emotional man, but recent events have made him more susceptible to these things...

Hammer: Where were you when I called?

Jessica: The airport. Hey, what are they gonna do? Fire me?

Hammer: Good point, it's not like their classic script will sell any tickets.

Jessica: It sounded like things weren't going well.

Hammer: They aren't. As you can see over there...

They walk over to the ledge of the building, and Hammer points out the raving lunatic rolling around in the dirt and screaming "ALLAH"

Hammer: My spiritual advisor.

Jessica: He looks worse than you described him.

Hammer: Well, he's gone sharply downhill today since they made his match at the show a bra and panties match.

Jessica: Does he usually wear women's underwear?

Hammer: I don't think so.

They walk over to the other side of the rooftop, and Hammer points at the gym where Yasmin & Alexxx entered just a couple of minutes ago.

Hammer: His opponent and a friend entered that building just before you got here. I think it might be best for Muhammad's safety if I don't tell him where they are right now.

Jessica: Remind me again, why did you have him wrestle this week instead of you?

Hammer: Babe, this body needs some rest. I've been wrestling almost non-stop for the last twelve months. Besides, this isn't even Pay Per View. It'd be like doing an indy film the day before starting shooting on a Spike Lee joint, know what I mean?

Jessica: Yeah, but do you really think he can do it?

Hammer: I thought so...but I'm starting to have doubts.

Jessica: Does he still want me to do that movie?

Hammer: At this rate, I don't know if he'll be doing his own movie. Tell ya what, why don't we get outta here and find some nice restaurant to get some food at?

Jessica: Private?

Hammer: Of course. Wait a minute...before we go...there's something I've always wanted to do on a rooftop that I've never gotten a chance to.

Jessica: Mutaaz Tareef, what kind of a Muslim are you to say something like that?

Hammer: Hey, we're not that confined with the sex! Jabbar's had like three wives or something, two of them at the same time!

Jessica: Right...

Hammer: More importantly, how did you know what I was thinking about?

Jessica: I was thinking the same thing.

Hammer: PRAISE ALLAH!

While all of that is going on, Ghetto Fire & Stoner have been having a little conversation about the match in the X-Press while smoking and watching music videos.

Ghetto Fire: You know what really grinds my gears?

Stoner: What's that?

Ghetto Fire takes a huge hit off the bong that Hammer gave Stoner & Yasmin for their anniversary. You would think their rage against Hammer would cause them to destroy it, but Ghetto Grass has never believed in wasting a perfectly good bong when they can get wasted easier.

Ghetto Fire: If we had really thought about it, we could have known all along that Hammer would desert us. Remember what the first thing he taught us was?

Stoner: Don't trust anybody.

Ghetto Fire: Exactly. He knew what he was gonna do all along!

Stoner: Wow...I never thought of it that way.

Ghetto Fire: We messed up, dude. We never should have trusted him, even though everything he ever taught us was accurate.

Stoner: But if everything he taught us was right, why would he stab us in the back?

Ghetto Fire takes another hit off the bong.

Ghetto Fire: Because..................I don't know. Hammer's a confusing guy.

Stoner: He sure is.

Ghetto Fire: You know...I've got a match too. On a scaffold!

Stoner: You better win that. The further you get in that Majestic Cup, the higher up we'll get in TCW.

Ghetto Fire: Well, we'll get high win or lose.

Stoner: I'll smoke to that!

Do we have anybody else talking? I'll bet we do. We head over to the gym, into the sauna to be precise, and we see Alexxx & Yasmin chatting it up. Since all Hammer posts are family-friendly, they are wearing towels. But if you read it after midnight you can see them with the towels off because the kids are in bed by then.

Alexxx: You know, for a non-wrestler you sure are trying to look like somebody that could at least fight.

Yasmin: I can't lose this match, Alexxx. Working under that old bastard would be a fate even worse than death.

Alexxx: Remember when you, me, Hammer & Jabbar went to the strip club?

Yasmin: Yeah, it was fun until PD & Shadow showed up.

Alexxx: How long do you think Hammer was planning on joining those guys?

Yasmin: I don't care.

Alexxx: No, this is important. I've been beating myself over losing the tag team titles for us ever since Endgame. I'm wondering if maybe Hammer meant to lose the match all along.

Yasmin: I don't know, girl. He did the Burning Hammer to PD through a table. Remember?

Alexxx: Yeah...but do you really think that Hammer wouldn't be heartless enough to have conspired with PD & Shadow to set all that shit up that cost us the belts?

Yasmin: You may have a point...somewhat. I don't think that Mutaaz is heartless.

Alexxx: Really?

Yasmin: No...I think that maybe his heart led him to doing what he did.

Alexxx: Huh?

Yasmin: You know him as well as I do, Alexxx. What Mutaaz Tareef wants more than anything else in this world is acceptance. All religious people want acceptance, but he wants it even more than the most devout believer. All his life, he's been keeping people around him that tell him how great he is. If somebody shows Mutaaz that they appreciate him, he's putty in their hands. Infinity made him an offer. They showed him respect. He wanted to make them happy, so he ditched us.

Alexxx: Yas, if all Hammer wants is acceptance, why would he turn his back on us? We accepted him! And don't tell me it's the pot thing either, because I've heard about some of the stuff that goes on at Infinity parties.

Yasmin: He wants acceptance from new people. If it means turning his back on his old friends to do it...he does. But let me ask you this...how many times have we actually seen him this week?

Alexxx: None.

Yasmin: That's why he's sent Jabbar to do his dirty work for him. He doesn't want to deal with us because a part of him still cares. Beating up somebody like Dean Dyer, or Darkness, that's no big deal. Mutaaz was never really close with them anyway. But I refuse to believe that Mutaaz Tareef never cared about us and was setting us up all along.

Alexxx: Hmmmm.

Yasmin: That's just my guess. I could be wrong.

Alexxx: Maybe you're on to something.

Yasmin: Jabbar hated us all along. That's why I have no problem whipping his ass.

Alexxx: Yeah, he was always quite the party pooper. Let's get out of here and get something to eat.

Alexxx & Yasmin exit the sauna, put on their clothes, and head out of the gym along with Limey. Limey looks across the street and notices something...

Limey: Hey, isn't that Mutaaz Tareef?

Alexxx & Yasmin look across the street, and sure enough, there's the Hammer exiting the building across the street arm in arm with his gal pal.

Alexxx: Looks like business just picked up, Yas.

Hammer continues to walk down the uncrowded Bahamas street with his partner who is showing her affection to him at the moment by slinging her arm over his shoulders, and after a few brief seconds the Muslim does the same.

As they watch them from afar the two Grass women converse about what they should do...

Yasmin: I think we should follow him.

Alexxx: Nah let him be; he looks happy.

Yasmin: I say we vote on it...

Alexxx: I vote no.

Yasmin: I vote yes, what about you Limey?

Limey: I vote yyyyyyeeaaaaaaah!

Alexxx: Ok fine.

The negative-sayer goes out the door and waits for Yasmin and the can of soda.

Yasmin: Limey, where are you?

Limey (in a scrunched voice): Over....here.

Yasmin then looks for the cute little guy and she finds him stuck under a five pound weight. Yasmin with ease lifts the metal up and brings up Limey to eye level.

Yasmin: You ready to go after Hammer and Alba?

Limey: No I voted against it, I was about to say 'no' but then that weight fell on me.

Yasmin: Well let's not tell Alexxx about this ok?

Limey: Only if you give me some sugar later tonight.

Yasmin: Sure.

The cute little guy means actual sugar, not what you're thinking of you filthy minded
person, you.

Let's listen in to the chat going on between the Muslim Megastar and the Playboy (TM) cover girl.

Hammer: Hollywood been treatin' you good?

Jessica: Yeah, oops.

Miss Alba accidentally drops a few stapled papers out of her purse onto the ground, looks sort of like a contract, Hammer notices this as he picks up the paper for her off the ground (like any good gentleman would) and hands it to his significant other.

Jessica expresses her thanks to Mutaaz but he only faintly hears her as he sees two of his former buds walking towards him.

Jessica: I'm so sorry--...

Hammer: Umm, hey want to see how strong I am.

Jessica: Well uh sure why no...

Before the most downloaded woman can finish her statement Hammer literally sweeps her off her feet and hurrily carries her for a block and turns into a store.

Bill's, Dave's, Steve's, and Mark's, was the name of the shop.

Hammer placed Jessica down carefully.

Jessica: Why'd we come in here?

Hammer: Because ummm I'll buy you anything your precious heart desires.

Jessica: Ok...

The couple looks around, looking at the lovely 'dog' collars for a few moments before the shopkeeper enters from behind the counter.

"Hello my name is Mr. Dough, need any help looking for toys?"

Hammer: No thanks, what's your first name Mr. Dough?

Mr. Dough: Dylan, but most call me Dill for short.

Jessica: Dill Dough?

Hammer: Excuse me but do you have a restroom?

Mr. Dough: Just go straight back.

Hammer: Thanks.

Mutaaz then rushes back and falls on the floor and laughs so hard you can actually tell his face his red.

He then picks himself up, washes his hands and then looks in the mirror.

Why did I think that was so funny?

I was just about to wonder that too. Ever since Hammer has converted to Islam Mutaaz has not found worldly humor that used to be funny to him, stuff like what just happened. Maybe his spirituality was fading as his advisor became closer and closer to being sent to the Bahamas Psych Ward.

Hammer just chills for a moment so he can hear the soft music that's playing lightly over the speakers.

"That's me in the corner losing my religion."

Hammer: Oh shut up.

The former tag champ wipes his hands and discards the paper towel into the trash and looks around the shop and sees Yasmin & Alexxx looking at whatever toys and chains are in the display case, close to the door.

Yasmin: I think Stoner would like the extra large rainbow one.

Alexxx: Well I know Davey (Havok) would love that spiky chain.


Yasmin: I'm sure he would Al.

Hammer then tries to find a backdoor to get out of this store, but then his lovely girl
comes up to him with a question.

Jessica: Can I have this black leather thon....

Hammer: Yeah sure whatever, how much is it?

Jessica: 36.99

Hammer: Here's the money...

Jessica: Thanks Muty.

What you try to think of a nickname for 'Mutaaz'! Azzy? Taaz? Ok maybe Taaz is better....everybody's a critic.

Mutaaz is still trying to figure out something, a distraction yeah that'll work, but
how?

Just in time we hear a horrid screaming and the door rings to signal that someone has stepped into the establishment.

"MUTAAZ?! What are you doing in here?"

Hammer rolls his eyes as he sees his now insane advisor.

Jabbar: Hey look at the huge long black one, I shall offer it's rubberness to Allah as an offering!!

Yasmin also notices (kinda hard not to) the crazy old man jabbering on. And it looks like we're about to have a fight.

Jabbar: Oh look it's the racially impure whore, and her butch friend.

Alexxx: Hey!

Yasmin: You want to bring it old man?

Hey before we get all violent and shit let's see what the adorable can of sugar is doing.

He's reading a graphic novel.

And no not the comic book type, an actual graphic novel.

Limey: Why would Superman want to lick Wonderwoman's cat? And how did they go from the moon to Superman's apartment in less then a second, neither one of them has teleporting powers; this book is so unrealistic and dumb.

And in the middle of all this action we......

FADE~!

Meanwhile, at the Ghetto Grass X-Press...

Stoner: I think the only reason we die is-

Ghetto Fire: Dude, I know what you're going to say, and I am so completely-

Stoner: Wait, wait wait! The only reason we die is...we accept it as an inevitability. *deep exhale*

Ghetto Fire: Do you think I'll ever find the right woman?

Stoner: Oh God! Yes, man! Come on! Dude, you're great!

This completely original discussion is interrupted by a E! News Brief (do they still do these things anymore? I don't have a clue, but we're going to one anyway)...

Ryan Seacrest: We have some breaking news for you...actress Jessica Alba was just spotted at a sex shop in the Bahamas with her boyfriend. We now send you to live footage of this very important story...

Ghetto Fire: Woah, they didn't even mention Hammer's name!

Stoner: Dude, why are they following her around like she's some kind of animal? They do this to all the celebrities...the paparazzi really needs to stop doing stuff like this.

Ghetto Fire: Hey, that's Alexxx!

Stoner: And Yasmin!

Ghetto Fire: And look, Jabbar's all yelling at them and stuff!

Stoner: Wow, this is the best E! News Brief ever!

Ghetto Fire: So why is Yasmin at a sex shop with Alexxx?

Stoner: Chicks do that kinda thing! Leave me alone!

Ghetto Fire: OK then...why is Mr. Religion and his advisor there?

Stoner: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Ghetto Fire: Let's go down there!

Stoner: But then we can't watch it on TV!

Ghetto Fire: Yeah, but if we watch it on TV, we can't kick Hammer's ass! It's just down the street!

Stoner: YIPPE-KI-YAY MOTHER TRUCKER!

Ghetto Fire & Stoner exit the X-Press and head on down towards the sex shop. I feel filthy just typing the words "sex shop". It just ain't right, you know?

Yeah, that's rich from a guy whose last post included people having sex on a rooftop and two naked chicks in a sauna.

Anyway, let's return to said "sex shop" right now, and re-join the conversation where we left it.

Yasmin: You want to bring it old man?

Jabbar: Oh, it's already been broughten! It just walked up to you, slapped you in the face and said "Hey bitch, how do you like dem apples? Fucking cuntrag douchewhore!"

Everybody's jaw drops after that one.

Jessica: This guy's your spiritual advisor?

Hammer: I swear to Allah he's usually not like this.

Yasmin: Alexxx, please tell me that he did not just say that.

Alexxx: Sorry girl, but he sure did.

Yasmin: SOMEBODY'S GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yasmin does a spear on Jabbar and they end up rolling on the floor like a...

Joey Styles: CAT FIGHT! CAT FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!

Thank you, Joey.

While that ridiculous display is going on, Hammer walks up to Mr. Dough and tries to smooth things over with him because certainly this fight will result in items being damaged...

Hammer: Listen, I'm sorry about all of this. The damages...they will be no problem. Just call up my boss, Ms. Valerie Stern with Twisted Championship Wrestling...she'll make sure it's all taken care of.

Dough: Thanks.

Hammer: Oh, and if she gets a bit rude, tell her you'll sue. That'll get you the money for sure.

Hammer walks back over to Jessica...

Hammer: You wanna go get that dinner?

Jessica: What about your friend?

Hammer: Oh, he'll be ok.

Whether he's ok or not could be debatable, as right now Yasmin is on top of Jabbar and banging his head into the floor. She then gets off Jabbar, drags him up and throws him into a pile of sex tapes. Jabbar groggily tries to get out of the pile, while looking at some of the titles.

Jabbar: Mindy Does Mecca? OUTRAGEOUS!

Jabbar hops back up and does a spear of his own on Yasmin, taking her through a Jenna Jameson stand-up.

Let's see how Limey's reading is going while we're at it...

Limey: Good Golly Miss Molly! I did not need to know that Superman was super in more ways than one. Though I must say that the artist did a pretty good job with Wonder Woman...yet, the dialouge is so lacking that I wonder how they sell any copies of this stuff. "Oh Superman, show me your Fortress of Sexitude?" What's that about?

Jabbar chokes Yasmin with a penis pump. Yes, I just wrote that. I never thought I'd be writing about an old Arabian man choking a young woman with a penis pump at this point in my life. But, here we are.

You might be wondering what Alexxx has been doing during all of this. Well, Alexxx has been standing back and watching the whole brutal display. She knows Yasmin wouldn't want her help, and she hasn't needed it for most of the fight. She notices Hammer & Jessica exiting through the front door, yet she doesn't have the urge to yell "SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!"

Just after Hammer shuts that front door, he and Jessica turn around to face some rather unpleasant guests...

Ghetto Fire: Hammer! Our buddy!

Ghetto Fire & Stoner smile in that "yeah, we're going to kick your ass now" kind of way while Hammer turns to Jessica and gulps.

Hammer: Do you see them too?

Jessica: Yeah, why?

Hammer: I was hoping that they were figments of my imagination...

Hammer: Do you see them too?

Jessica: Yeah, why?

Hammer: I was hoping that they were figments of my imagination...

Miscommunication, the number one killer of all relationships.

Besides, drugs and alcohol.

And the unity of Jessica Alba and Mutaaz Tareef is no exception to the rule.

When Hammer was asking about ‘seeing them', he was referring to his angry former stablemates, Ghetto Fire and Stoner and the fact that it looked like they we're ‘ready to rumble'.

God I hate that movie.

But Miss Alba looked straight passed the two druggies and in the not so far distance was a MOB of paparazzi and television cameras.

So let us see how that works itself out.

Jessica: We should run back up to the balcony.

Hammer: It would be too late these two are already close enough to us.

Jessica: You mean two-hundred?

Hammer: No there are just two guys in front of us Stoner and Ghetto and they can pretty much hear every damn thing we are saying.

Jessica: Oh yeah them, but what about those flashes going off over there.

Hammer: Ah big deal...

Jessica: Hammer baby I'm tired of seeing myself all over magazine covers without my makeup on, let's go, they've probably already snapped well over five thousand pictures.

Hammer: Ok fine. Hey guys look, people are trying to take pictures of you!

Ghetto: O rly?

Hammer didn't even have time to respond with the customary ‘Ya Rly' as he and Jessica zoom off back to where they came from.

Ghetto and Stoner then await the oncoming onslaught of star seekers.

Stoner: Dude with all this media attention you're so going to score.

Ghetto: Heh heh sweet.

But the men's dreams are demolished as the paparazzi all say ‘get out of the way!' or they just simply step on them.

Ghetto: Ow, ow, hey watch it!

Stoner: Dude, shit, not cool, stop it!

The visual of the stoners getting trampled is entertaining, yet let's get a have a change in scenery shall we?

Every glass case, every nipple tweaker, almost every tape, all of these things, destroyed due to the carnage caused by the two fighting middle easterns.

At the moment Yasmin had Jabbar in a spanking position and had a long leather whip in her hand.

Yasmin: Say you love Israel!

Jabbar: Never you fungus munching skank.

Yasmin: Hey, we're not allowed to use words like that, you need to put a cork in it!

Yasmin then grabs a near by gag and shoves into Jabbar's.

Yasmin: There we go.

Jabbar: Mmmmhggmhmm

Yasmin: Shoosh.

She then cracks the whip on Jabbar's backside, the layers of sheets covering Jabbar had thinned considering his nervous breakdown where he tore off his clothes and this whole fight, pieces have been falling off, so you know it had to hurt.

She smacks him with it again.

At this point Mr. Dough has brought his home camera out and is taping the footage.

Limey has finished reading ‘The Adventures of Wonderwoman and Superman: Planet Uranus' and will soon put up his full review on his MySpace.

I hate that site too.

I hate a lot of things.

Limey: Excuse me Mr. Dough, but what are you trying to reach under the counter?

Mr. Dough: Huh? Oh nothing.

Limey: You sure? Because it looks like you keep putting your hand forward and then just all of a sudden jerking it back, and then you keep doing it again and again.

If that part wasn't awkward for you, I bet I can make it MORE uncomfortable for you.

Here it comes...

Wait for it...

I'm only fourteen!

HA! Yeah you feel like a pervert don't you?

You sick bastard.

Back to the action:

Yasmin is about to lay another pounding on Jabbar's old wrinkly ass when gets a chain around her neck with one arm and begins to choke her out.

Mr. Dough: Oh yeah you like that don't you.

Limey: No I don't like one of my friends getting choked out, that's stupid.

Jabbar then has Yasmin and screams ‘ALLAH' before leaping up into the air with both his feet aimed at the upper region of Yasmin. But then he doesn't come down.

Jabbar: WHAT IN THE GREAT FUCKIN NAME OF ALLAH IS GOING ON?

Limey: It looks as if Mr. Dough paused the tape, but that's impossible to pause real stuff, what in blue daisies is going on around here?

Just then the door is crashed open and two white guys dressed in Blues Brothers type suits walk in. One man is several years older than the other one, and has almost a beer gut type thing going, and the older ones' hair is much shorter than the shaggy haired younger glasses wearing guy.

Younger Guy: Hello my name is Steve.

Older Guy: And my name is Steve.

Both: We are the Steve & Steve Wrestling Committee.

Younger Steve: We over see all wrestling moves that take place internationally and make sure that no one is using a move that is not allowed.

Older Steve: And you Muhammed Jabbar...

Jabbar: THHHHHHHHHAAAAAAT's MEEEEEEEE~!

Older Steve: Yeah I know that's what we were told, and you are about to perform a double stomp.

Jabbar: What's your point?

Younger Steve: Just recently in a highly respectable column a new rule has been made that only a man named Low-KI/Senshi can do that move.

Older Steve: Yeah you should check out that column; the guy who writes it is a friggin' genius.

Younger Steve: So your options are either flip or just do a senton splash, but no double stomping.

Jabbar: Damn Infidels trying to tell me what to do! I'll do what I want when I want, ALLAH STOMP!

Jabbar finally comes down and crushes both of his feet because Yasmin has gone after her husband who she saw through the window.

Jabbar: SWEET ALLAH ON A CORNDOG *Arab expletive* *Arab expletive**Arab expletive* *Arab expletive*.

Older Steve: Glad we could help.

Younger Steve: Hey how's about we go chase after Jessica Alba?

Older Steve: Sounds great, after a beer though.

Younger Steve: You know you're becoming a full-blown redneck right?

Older Steve: I'm not a redneck you foo, do rednecks drink, go to the bowling alley and watch NASCAR?

Younger Steve: I'm not even going to answer that.

Hammer and Jessica had finally made it to the top of the roof and looked over the edge as paparazzi unknowingly ran in an opposite direction as relief came over the faces of the two.

Hammer: Ah, what a ride these past two days have been...

Jessica: You mean like how you were riding...

"Eeew stop right there, too much information there."

Hammer: Alexxx what are you doing up here?

Alexxx: Oh just trying to escape the madness is all.

Jessica: Yeah its nuts down there.

Hammer: Oh you might not want to lean against that edge; I think it might be dirty.

Alexxx: Oh of course this is an old tall building.

Hammer: Yeah but there might be some recent umm uhhhh excrement there.

Alexxx: Oh...

An awkward moment of silence is broken by Stoner, Ghetto, followed by Yasmin running behind them up the stairs.

Stoner: It is time to smoke the last pipe dude.

Ghetto: Your last huff.

Yasmin: Your last fucking up the anal canal.

WTF

Yasmin: Sorry Jabbar's bad words affected me.

Jessica: Hey look everybody a beautiful sun setting.




Thank you Google Images.

Then everyone looks towards the ocean and admires the glamorous sun going down in thirty different types of reddish colors.

Stoner hugs Yasmin.

Hammer embraces Jessica.

Alexxx grips Limey.

Ghetto takes a hit of a joint in his pocket.

The END.